If you’re ready to trust online social networking site owners, then close to one billion people are connected to such sites, including Facebook, Myspace, LinkedIn, and others. Naturally, this becomes a new cyber civilization where the virtual inhabitants are supposed to follow some specific rules or discipline to stay connected with each other.
By Rakesh Raman
While there are many ways to address this emerging need, let’s start with the most crucial aspect – how to insult others.
Here are 5 simple ways to do that:
1. Messages – You can start by sending unsolicited sales-type messages, taking care that others should not be connected with your message topic at all. And ensure that the length of your message is so long that the person on the other side should yawn at least half dozen times while reading it.
No…you need not address the targeted recipients by name because that way they will never feel insulted. Simply throw your message like a stone on their head. If you’re not satisfied with the outcome, repeat this process till the time their head starts bleeding. While it’s not that difficult, this method is supposed to be very effective to upset your friends as well as foes.
2. Neglect – Even if somebody sends you a genuine message with respect, just ignore it as if a beggar has approached you with some request. Social networking doesn’t mean that any Tom, Dick, or Harry should be able to contact you even if they’re in your list of friends. When you get such messages from your friends, you should simply press the “Delete” button. For better results, don’t hesitate to report even these respectful messages as spam.
3. Events – Good networking platforms like Facebook and LinkedIn provide you with a useful insulting tool – Event Invite. It’s free. Just bombard others using this tool. Yes, you can send even a dozen invites a day. But make sure that these events are totally irrelevant for the people you’re targeting. Let the others keep guessing about them and clearing their event invite boxes.
4. Chat – Only the topmost hangouts like Facebook allow you to insult others with this wonderful option. If somebody wants to chat with you, don’t respond. Just run away like kids do in a school. And never appear again on the site for a few hours – usually 4 hours should be sufficient.
And when you reappear, don’t allow this friend to have any kind of social networking liberty with you. This method is relatively new but slowly gaining popularity among all those who believe that social networking is meant to hurt others.
5. Silence – You can keep hanging around for days and nights in the corner of a social media site. But never say a word – good or bad – to others. The more stubborn you are, the more insulted your friends will feel.
Your social exposure should never go beyond some random ‘Like’ to posts or pages or some new connections to expand your ‘insult’ terrain. So, your rudeness can easily win you some distinct reputation in the online social universe.
This is the new-generation social networking, which gives you ample opportunity to create a culture of hatred and abuse for others. And you must give credit to all leading social networking sites that are hell-bent to pit humans against humans – millions at a time.
Try these simple steps to successfully annoy others. With regular practice, you can become a skilful social media insulter.
If you want to quickly learn all cyber civilization rules, here’s some more useful literature for you: